Sunday, February 26, 2012

Crazy Urges

I had my first real audition for a professional company this weekend, and it has left me wanting more. Honestly, I don't think I did that great, but the thrill of being in a room with a multitude of high energy people, doing my best, for the possibility of changing my life and actually getting paid to do something that I love-- well, it's addicting.

It is great to have a steady job. I really, really, really like getting a paycheck every Friday, and being able to buy food. Really. I enjoy having low stress levels. But every day I walk through the door of that call center, I am waiting for that opportunity to come that means I won't have to anymore. I am terrified of looking around and realizing that I am twenty-two and still spending all day on the phone with strangers who don't want to hear that the San Francisco Ritz-Carlton is completely sold out. I know I am young, but that is precisely the point. The time to do things is while you are young. I hate missing opportunities.

Maybe I don't have what it takes, but maybe I do. I know what I do have: a strong work ethic and an intense passion.

If I am completely honest with myself, I want to quit my job, pool my savings, and make a run for whatever professional auditions I can get to. Of course, I'm not going to do that. But I want to. I am at a stage in my life where I have realized that my dreams are not going to come true unless I have a business plan for making them come true, and I am having trouble fitting a 9 to 5 job into that business plan. For the money, certainly. For the time restraints...not so much.

People figure this out, though. They do.

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